The New Recipe

(Another parable of Safed the Sage)

There was a morning when I rose from my bed, and looked at the sunrise, and thanked God that I was alive, even as I do each day. And I descended and came down, and ate my breakfast. And behold, upon the table there were Doughnuts. Now if there be Doughnuts, I eat of them, but they minish not in any wise the other things that I eat, for I eat of them last.

And I said unto Keturah, Hast thou bought Sinkers from the Market? For I had not smelled the cooking of them.

And she said, I have not; for I value my peace of mind and the good will of my husband. I made these. Yea, and I made them by a New Recipe.

And I said, Wherefore wilt thou try New Recipes when already thy Doughnuts are perfect?

And she said, It is not thus that thou dost preach, for thou dost ever exhort men to do better and better.

And I said, Thine aspiration to have things better and better is thine only fault. Thou dost even try to have it so with thy Husband.

And she said, Yea, and this far I have done very well in the matter of his improvement.

So I ate of the Doughnuts, and I said, Behold, these are just like all of thy Doughnuts.

And she said, I am glad thou dost think so. For they are so made that they absorb less Fat; therefore are they more Wholesome.

And I said, Go not too far with me in that Wholesome stunt; I do not want things too Wholesome; I can digest anything save it be Health Foods.

And she said, My lord, when I try a New Recipe, thus do I try it. I consider all the things that I have been wont to use that I know are good, and if I find in the New Recipe some other good thing, that also do I put in.

And I said, Keturah, thou hast the finest idea of Progress to be found in any cook on earth. For thou goest ahead, but thou playest not far from thy Base.

And I said, If all the reformers would learn of thee, then would the Millennium come sooner.

And she said, I am glad that thou dost like the new Doughnuts.

And I verily did like them. For they had one ingredient that changeth not, and that is Keturah.

For, believe me, her Doughnuts are Some Doughnuts.

The Man From Jonesville

Now, there was among my Neighbors a man whose name was Smith, and he was from Jonesville. And he told me often of Jonesville, what a Lovely Place it was, and how every one who lived there was Happy and Virtuous, and how sorry he was that he ever had left there, and how he wanted to go back to Jonesville. And when the men in the city where I lived failed to clean the Snow off their Sidewalks, or the City Council indulged in Graft, or the children were Rude, or there was an Early Frost, he told me that Such Things did not happen in Jonesville. And this continued for nigh unto Twenty Years; and the older he grew the more he talked about Jonesville. And I told him I hoped that when he died he would go to Jonesville.

Now it came to pass that he prospered, so that he retired from Business. And he sold his House and Lot in the City wherein I dwell, and went back to Jonesville that he might Spend his Last Years in Peace, and Die in Jonesville. And we all Bade him Farewell, with something of sorrow, and something of Relief.

And it came to pass that at the end of Six Months, he and his wife moved back again, and bought back their Old House for a Thousand Dollars more that they sold it for. And they were Tenfold more Happy to get back than they had been to go away.

And it came to pass on an Evening that Keturah and I called on them. I said, Old Fellow, tell me on the Level, what was the matter with Jonesville?

And he said to me, Speak not to me of Jonesville, lest I do thee Harm. It is the toughest Joint this side of State Prison. The dear people we knew have all died or moved away, and they who are in their places are Unneighborly and Snobbish. And they Tango and do other Outrageous Stunts, and their Kids are the Limit. We have come back to Dwell in the place where we have spend Twenty Happy Years, and we have but one favor to ask of our old Neighbors, and that is, that they never speak to us of Jonesville.

And as Keturah and I walked home, I spake to her, and said, Keturah.

And Keturah answered, I know what thou art about to say; and I suspected all the time that it would be just so.

And I said, There are many men and women who sigh for some Jonesville or other, who might be Decently Happy where they are if they would make it their business.

And Keturah said, Our Jonesville is right here.

And I said, Amen.

"Now is the Time": The Problem, in a Nutshell

Overheard, chez Fausto, at the breakfast table this morning:

Fausto: You know, there's been some grumbling lately on [Peacebang's] blog about the UUA's "Now is the Time" campaign.

Mrs. Fausto: What's that?

How well do you know the Hebrew Bible?

Not as well as you'd like? Well, then, you're in luck.

Yale University has posted here a complete collection of course materials -- syllabus, lecture notes, video lectures, reading assignments, etc. -- for its undergraduate “Introduction to the Old Testament” course. It’s as close as you can come to actually sitting there in the lecture hall and auditing the course in real time. (Plus you don’t have to live in New Haven!)

For extra credit, identify the particular text and volume in the image below, and their significance:

Vote.

Unfortunately, a new day job has cut deeply into the time I have been able to devote to thinking deep thoughts and disgorging them here, but I am nevertheless flattered that two of my blog entries have been nominated as the "Best Single Entry" in the the "Best Religious Writing or Theological Commentary" category of the 2007 UU Blog Awards.

They are:

Biblical Prooftexting for UUs

and

Unitarian Judas.

My humble thanks to the unknown person or persons who nominated me. And to the UUpdater for all the effort involved in hosting the awards.

Now, gentle reader, please go cast your vote here. Be heard, whether it's my voice you admire or one of the many other inspired and articulate voices in the growing UU blogosphere.

Epiphany

Twelfth Night
(The Song of the Camels)

Elizabeth Coatsworth

Not born to the forest are we,
Not born to the plain,
To the grass and the shadowed tree
And the splashing of rain.
Only the sand we know
And the cloudless sky,
The mirage and the deep-sunk well
And the stars on high.

To the sound of our bells we came
With huge soft stride,
Kings riding upon our backs
And slaves at our side,
Out of the east brought on
By a dream of a star,
Seeking the hills and the groves
Where the fixed towns are.

Our goal was no palace gate,
No temple of gold,
But a child in his mother's lap
In the cloudy cold.
The olives were windy and white,
Dust swirled through the town,
As all in their royal robes
Our masters knelt down.

Then back to the desert we paced
In our phantom state
And faded again in the sands
That are secret as fate--
Portents of glory and danger,
Our dark shadows lay
At the feet of the babe in the manger
And then drifted away...

Biblical Prooftexting for UUs

For a couple of centuries now, we Unitarians and Universalists have tended to hold a pretty relaxed view of Biblical authority. We tend to see the Bible as an anthology of human spiritual insight from an ancient time – some of which may still be useful in our own lives, some of which has been superseded or refuted by more recently acquired human knowledge, but none of which comes directly to us from God’s mouth as a perfect utterance or supernatural set of rules.

As a result, may of us don’t take the Bible as seriously as we might. Which is too bad, because a lot of that ancient human insight is still pretty reliable. In fact, we tend to forget that historically it is the original source of many of the distinctive religious premises that we UUs think define us and set us apart from mainstream Christianity.

Unfortunately, one of the consequences of this is that when we do get into religious discussions with Real Christians[TM], we find ourselves at a disadvantage, because many of them ascribe such overwhelming authority to the Bible that won’t take any religious argument seriously that isn’t supported by Scriptural prooftexts. We UUs generally do not place much credence ourselves in the probative value of Scripture, much less prooftexting, not only because we do not hold the same exalted view of Biblical authority that conservative Christians do, but also because it is so easy to misconstrue or misapply the meaning of a text. We would agree with Shakespeare's observation in The Merchant of Venice that even “the Devil can cite Scripture for his purpose” (that is, provided we assume at least for the sake of argument the existence of a Devil). If we remember those Biblical passages that our denominational ancestors traditionally used to support our religious beliefs, though, and if we can cite them when appropriate, we might regain some of the influence we have lost over the years in the larger interdenominational and interfaith discussion.

So, ladies and gentlemen, coming to you direct from a prior engagement at the KJV Fundamentalist Auditorium, here are a few Bible verses that we Unitarians and Universalists have traditionally understood “our” way.

On the validity of religious insights from beyond the Abrahamic tradition:

Matthew 2:1-2 Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judaea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.

John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

John 10:16 And other sheep I have, which are not of this fold: them also I must bring, and they shall hear my voice; and there shall be one fold, and one shepherd.

On perceiving Jesus as a human exemplar, rather than a deity incarnate:

John 17:3 And this is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent.

I Timothy 2:5 For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.

On the principle of “deeds, not creeds”:

Micah 6:6-8 Wherewith shall I come before the LORD, and bow myself before the high God? shall I come before him with burnt offerings, with calves of a year old? Will the LORD be pleased with thousands of rams, or with ten thousands of rivers of oil? shall I give my firstborn for my transgression, the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?

He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?

Matthew 7:21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.

On revering the immanence of divinity in nature, or “earth-centered spirituality” as we sometimes call it:

Genesis 1:31a And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good.

Psalm 19:1-6
The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork.
Day unto day uttereth speech, and night unto night sheweth knowledge.
There is no speech nor language, where their voice is not heard.
Their line is gone out through all the earth, and their words to the end of the world. In them hath he set a tabernacle for the sun,
Which is as a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, and rejoiceth as a strong man to run a race.
His going forth is from the end of the heaven, and his circuit unto the ends of it: and there is nothing hid from the heat thereof.

Psalm 23:2-3a
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters: he restoreth my soul.

Psalm 24: 1-2
The earth is the LORD’s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.
For he hath founded it upon the seas, and established it upon the floods.

Psalm 139:7-12
Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?
If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.
If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;
Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.
If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night shall be light about me.
Yea, the darkness hideth not from thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the light are both alike to thee.

On the inherent worth and dignity of every person:

Genesis 1:27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

Matthew 25:34-40 Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

More specifically, but to the same point, Unitarians have traditionally denied the doctrine of Original Sin as developed by St. Augustine and emphasized to the point of unhealthy obsession in Calvinism. Contrary to widespread Christian teaching, there is no Fall of Man in the Garden of Eden story, and no corresponding consequence of total depravity and unworthiness or eternal damnation burdening all the descendants of Adam and Eve. Instead, there is only a specific, rather moderate and limited, punishment for their limited transgression -- pain in childbirth, and toil for sustenance:

Genesis 3:16-19 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life. Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field. In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.

And finally, on the universal reach of divine love and reconciliation, excluding no one on the basis of culture, tradition or belief:

Matthew 18:12-14 How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.

I Timothy 2:3-4 For this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Saviour, who will have all men to be saved, and to come unto the knowledge of the truth.

I Timothy 4:10 For therefore we both labour and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Saviour of all men, specially of those that believe.

Solstice Mistakes for UUs to Avoid

1. Don’t turn the Flaming Chalice into a seasonal idol. It has no seasonal significance. In fact, it has no figurative significance at all. It began out of convenience as a randomly chosen image for some stationery, for goodness’ sake.

2. Don’t turn the 7 Principles into a seasonal idol. They have no seasonal significance. They may be sound rules to live by, but they aren’t our creed or a statement of our highest truths. They are no more than a transitory statement of broad propositions that all of us in our wide theological diversity were at one time willing to support, a lowest common denominator. When they were first written and adopted, it was on the express condition that they be periodically reconsidered and revised as appropriate. We are already several years late in meeting that condition, so it could even be said that their denominational validity has lapsed.

3. Don’t envy or covet the authentic seasonal observances of other traditions if they don’t have authentic meaning for you. As your mother told you a million times, “Just because everyone else is doing it doesn’t mean you have to go along.”

4. Don’t bowdlerize the authentic seasonal observances of other traditions to make them more enjoyable or meaningful to you. It’s an insensitive, self-centered affront to others, who take their own traditions quite seriously and might see even well-intentioned imitation as blasphemy or mockery. Rather, celebrate other traditions’ seasonal observances authentically if at all, and preserve and uphold our own authentic traditions of the season as well. We have enough of our own not-oppressively-dogmatic seasonal heritage to draw upon if we wish – for example, the Puritans’ rationalist rejection of midwinter celebrations of Jesus’ birth as being unsupported from Scriptural or other evidence; or Charles Follen’s 19th-century re-introduction of Christmas trees and other “Yuletide” traditions that had been forbidden as unacceptably pagan by the Puritans; or Edmund Sears’ beloved carol, “It Came Upon the Midnight Clear”, which manages to express the spirit of the season without mentioning Jesus; or Charles Dickens' similarly Jesus-less masterpiece, "A Christmas Carol"; or James Pierpont’s “Jingle Bells”; or Thomas Nast’s Santa Claus illustrations.

5. Whatever you do to mark the season, don’t just pull it out of your @$$ and make it up as you go along, while holding forth as if “this” is what “we” do at this time of year. Most people are smarter than that, or at least most other people are, so it only makes “us” all look like fools and dilettantes.

If you’d like to simplify your seasonal planning by avoiding all these mistakes at once, consider avoiding Chalica.

Mrs. Fausto Wants to Know

if Chalice Chick can please explain the difference between a bailment and a license.

The Interdependent Web of All Famous UUs

In which Famous UUs Matt Groening and Keith Olbermann scratch each other's back: